scared to death of everything...

I'm scared of way too many things, and i have no idea what to do. literally. i dunno who to talk to, i dunno if i should, i dunno what i'm doing...

• scared i won't make it into any nursing schools
• scared i won't get accepted into YWAM
• scared i'll end up an old maid because no one can handle me
• scared someone will fall in love with me and i wont noe how to love them back because i'm not whole
• scared i won't be able to survive
• scared my life isn't really my own
• scared i'll lose sight of who i am in a search for myself (i know, i don't make sense)
• scared no one feels the same way
• scared someone will think they know what to do for me and ruin everything
• scared no one knows how to help me
• scared i really do need help
• scared...of the future

i honestly don't know.

anything.

i'm scared that my fear of living in the past is whats causing this, because i refuse to think about it.

it hurts too much to remember.

so i try not to, and maybe thats whats killing me.

then again, i don't think i could survive thinking about the past.

i don't know.

i'm so scared...